The Voice of God

Greetings,

     It has been five days since I have returned from leading my senior high youth group back from mission trip.  I have to be honest and tell you that I am still exhausted.  I am not sure whether it is physical, mental, or spiritual exhaustion but it's one of them...or maybe all of them.  However, after replaying the trip in my head and in my heart I have come to the conclusion that it was one of the best trips I have ever been associated with.
     Before our trip began I had prayed that God would give me clear direction in my leadership.  He accomplished that by giving me three outstanding adult leaders.  Christine and Cassie and Brian Elder served with servant hearts.  They made it possible for me to do what I needed to do on this trip.  God was so good to us as we served the Lamar Hospice.  I believe that each one of us gave all that we had on that trip and I believe that God was glorified.
     Now, as I get back to the normal day to day workings of the church I feel as if I need to hear the voice of God.  I know that's a strange phrase and rarely does anyone hear it without some sort of snicker or eyebrow raising.  I think that most people believe that anyone who hears the voice of God either belongs in a psychiatrist's office or in jail.  I sometimes wonder why that is the case.  As Christians we are called to listen for the voice of God.  It was by His voice that the universe was spoken into existence.  It was by His voice that the prophets were called to speak and it is by His voice that we are called to action.  Hearing the voice of God does not make you crazy it makes you a better Christian!
     So, after completing my 18th year of mission trips I felt like I needed to listened for God to speak.  I have always loved being a part of senior high mission trips.  The energy and excitement, camaraderie and companionship, are things that I will never forget.  Still, since my brain surgeries I have found it harder and harder to answer the call of mission.  The toll that mission takes on my body, mind, and spirit has become almost unbearable.  So, the time has come for me to ask God if He is still calling me to mission ministry.
     Ten years ago I would have told you that nothing could keep me from going on mission trips.  However, that was ten years ago.  A lot has happened since then.  Sure, the surgeries and constant pain play a part but I truly believe that God has equipped me in other areas since then.  I feel a calling to teach and preach His word more than I ever have before.  I feel a calling to help people to grow in their spiritual giftedness and apply those gifts  in ministry in the church.  I feel different than I did ten years ago.
     I want to do what God wants me to do.  The words, "If He wants you to go on mission then He will give you the strength to do it", ring in my head.  I know those words are true and, yet, it does not relieve me of the obligation to ask the question.  I have to take time to hear God's voice! 
     My journey home has not been a straight and narrow path. Nor has it been a primrose path.  My journey home has taken me beside the still waters and deep into the valley of the shadow of death.  The same mouth that I have used to praise God is the same mouth that I have used to curse Him.  Yet, throughout this journey I have learned that God is with me and He is guiding me.  I have learned the sound of His voice and I have recognized it as my shepherd.  It is that voice that I will listen to and it is that voice that will guide me. 
     Am I afraid of what He might say?  Of course I am.  I am afraid He will say that my time as mission trip leader has come to an end and I am afraid that He will say that it hasn't!  Yet, through it all I have the joy of knowing that there are only two voices that I must obey...God's and Christine's! As my journey home approaches this fork in the road I would ask that you would pray for me.  Pray that I will hear the voice of my Master and pray that I will obey!
     If God does call my mission time to an end and Mission 2010 was my last trip I have the joy in this...I gave everything I had for as long as He gave it to me...I left everything on the mission field!

Untill next time,

Derek