Priceless!

Greetings,

Certain things in life are meant to be shared.  A great joke, a warm blanket in the midst of a cold football game, and great stories!  Well, being that I am a great sharer I have one of those things for you...A great story.  Now, before I begin I must admit that I was told this story.  Unfortunately, I did not witness it first hand, but oh how I wish I could have!

This story begins with a girl, a sprinkler system, and a very, very scared snake!

Earlier this morning my daughter Stephanie was heading off to her 8 to 5 job at PRG.  As she does every morning she got up, took her shower, fixed her face ( whatever that means) and bounced out the door bubbly and ready to face the world that was her's this day!  Now, as I said before I was not at the house at that particular time.  I had decided to go golfing.  For any of you that golf you will appreciate my next statement.  As much as I love golf I would have given anything to be home at this particular time.  Anyway, Stephanie comes out the door and steps off of our cement steps.  Well, it just so happened that there was a snake coiled up in the corner sunning itself for what, I believe, was a busy day for the snake.  Just as Stephanie steps off of the first step the snake decides that she has just entered into it's "space".  Being a snake and reacting as snakes are suppose to react it snapped at her.  I use the term snap because I am not sure that the snake was big enough to be considered a true "strike".  Well, whether it was a snap, a strike, or just a nice gesture by the snake to start an other wise bad day, I believe that Stephanie interpreted it as an attack of epic proportion.  You know how the media says that the true purpose of terrorism is to cause terror?  Well as silly as that sounds, if that is true, I believe that Stephanie considered that snake enemy number one, the Ace of spades, the spawn of Osama Bin Laden!

So, the "strike" has occurred and Stephanie freaks!  She begins screaming and running, running and screaming!  As she tells the story she can't remember how she got to the tree in the middle of our yard but she did.  Whether she ran, hopped, pranced, or was somehow transported there, she ended up on a burm in the middle of our front yard.  What she later learned, but was oblivious to at the time, was that she was standing in the middle of my sprinkler system!  Oh for a camera and the address to "Funniest Home Videos"!

What makes this story truly hilarious, or horrifying (you pick), is that my daughter is deathly afraid of snakes.  Wait, I am not embellishing her fear, she is DEATHLY AFRAID OF SNAKES! I mean she can't look at them in real life or on the TV.  She won't talk about them, joke about them, or be amused at anyone around her that does.  She HATES snakes.  So, you can imagine her terror at being in the midst of a "SNAKE ATTACK".  Now, for those of you who are, at this very moment, thinking to yourself that I am an uncaring father...you are probably right!  If it would have been a rattlesnake I am sure that I would have had shovel in hand as I searched for the snake in my garage.  The truth is it wasn't a rattlesnake and, because it wasn't, that makes this story hilarious to me.  Call me an uncaring father, call me a real jerk, call me anything you want but don't call me until I am done laughing!

So, the snakes attacks, my daughter freaks, the snake panics, my daughter panics, the snake books it for the garage and my daughter books it for the tree!  That's pretty much how it happened!  What I didn't share, and the thing that makes this story a keeper, is the scream that Stephanie let out.  My wife described it as "real fear", my son, on the other hand, thought it was two dogs fighting each other for their lives.  In fact when Steph came inside and was holding her trembling little face in her hands my son, who has the appropriateness of a two year old says, "Did you hit one of the dogs with your car?".  My boy, you have to be proud!

Not long ago I spent some time on my blog talking about Andy Andrew's book The Noticer.  The book talked about looking at life from a different perspective.  I suppose that's what I did when I was told this story.  I knew how scared my daughter was but I began to wonder how scared the snake was.  I mean, the snake didn't charge Stephanie, she entered his space.  The snake, who by the way we named Bobby, was only reacting the way a snake is suppose to react.  I began to imagine, just as Steph had done, that the snake made it back to his, or her, family and began to tell a horrifying story.  "Do you know what happened to me today?", the snake might have said.  "I was sunning myself on the cement steps and this giant human, and you know how afraid I am of humans, attacked with no provocation.  I was terrified!  I was so scared I jumped  of my skin and screamed as loud as I could.  I think it must have thought that I was trying to bite her because she ran to a tree and starting to get a stick so she could kill me.  Mom, I was so afraid!"  Well, if there is any justice in this world then I hope that the Dad of that snake had a good laugh!,

Perspective, it is what turns a terrifying experience into a life learning experience.  Am I glad the snake didn't bite her?  Sure I am.  I am not that mean of a father.  The only thing that I hope is that they both, Stephanie and the snake, learned something.  I hope that Stephanie learned that as scary as the snake attack felt it didn't kill her.  For the snake, I hoped it learned that not all humans immediately go for shovel!  Nevertheless both the snake and Steph live to run another day!

I pray that your days will be filled with perspective.  Some look at their lives and grieve what could have been and know that things will never get better and can only go downhill.  Some can look at the same life and be excited that things can never be worse and that there is only up.  May your lives be filled with the UP!

Until next time or until another "ATTACK" may your lives be blessed!

Blessings,

Derek